Sis.

She's the one on the right. My best friend. My sister. CarPar.
For four years we've faced our teenage years together.
But now she is almost 18 and we're going to part. But we'll come back to each other.
It only goes up for us. I believe that. In the name of Jesus and His faithfulness, I believe that.

 I had *almost* published this post about four times before I actually did. There is so much I feel I'm leaving out. But I think you will get the point.

I just wanted to say that there are not many people I know who are more courageous, loyal, and loving as she is.

Carly has been forgiving to me when I mess up (I mess up a LOT). She tells me her honest thoughts, even if they sting a little. But her words are always spoken with grace. And when she is the one to make a mistake, she confesses and shows brave humility.  I desire a vulnerability and rawness like hers.

I have shared with her what no other friend of mine has heard. Even if I didn't want to. And that's normal for her, to be vented to. Because the people trust her. She's everybody's friend. The in-crowd, the outcasts, etc. You name it. I mean, I'm 97% sure her Sweet 16 was the entire population of Houston in one room. A different year she had an American girl-themed party and invited all the little girls she knew ages 3-6. She welcomes them all, and she wouldn't have it any other way.

Also, dear readers, she is a party inside of a human body. She is not afraid to intimidate if it means being herself. You can't see her eyes in pictures because she squints them from smiling so big. She knows joy full well. And she's really funny. If you ever see her, ask her about her penguin joke. It makes no sense and that is the point. You can't help but laugh at the ridiculousness. Carly is wonderful, and you could never convince me otherwise, also because one time she let me read her elementary/ middle school diary all the way through. I almost died of the hilarity. Only the best of friends go that far.

Did I mention that she's gorgeous? She won a pageant one time, I was told. Ha. Hello, eyelashes-for-days. But I'm not kidding— she is beautiful in every way. I hope and pray she knows that.

But— my most favorite thing about her is her God, straight up. She listens & speaks to Him intimately.   She celebrates life in all its hardness, because of the cross. The answers to her many questions are intentionally sought out in our Father. I have noticed an appreciation of simplicity in her. Sometimes what I overlook, she sees. She soaks in the Love without all the fancy, frilly, unnecessary junk.

Jesus is the only reason for our growth. I am forever grateful for the blessing He's given our sisterhood.

 Next August, Carly is escaping her comfort and traveling across the world for 9 months. She's heading on #OperationFlyBabyFly, her momma says. It's her story to tell, so you can read it here.
Pray for her fervently with me in this new season? She, and even more so the Kingdom of God, is deserving of your supportive participation, if you are feeling the nudge to do so.

Carly Elizabeth Parker is a light on this earth and in our friendship.
The selfish part of me wants to keep her all to myself, but I couldn't be so cruel to the world to do such a thing.

Sweet will be the flower

There's something about the wild unpopularity of poetry that pulls me in. Or maybe it's that it is like nothing else you'll read, but you seem to find it in every feature of life.

When I feel like I am too much and not enough at the same time, I head to the pages of rhythmic words. They're steady. They remind me why I cling on to hope. They welcome me home. 

Sometimes God tells us to do something, and the time we decide to say yes is when He makes us wait for the good part. And we may never see it until the day we go. But William Cowper helps me remember how much the good part will be worth it.

"His purposes will ripen fast,

Unfolding every hour;

The bud may have a bitter taste,

But sweet will be the flower."

Poetry will slow you down if you let it. I embrace that, and read every word like it's my last. Think about it. His purposes are unfolding… every. single. hour. 

The promise of Jesus. Hallelujah. 

Or maybe you've been seeking, but faith won't seem to show its face…

I am weary of trying, God.

Charles Wesley tells me to start with being honest to the One in whom our faith is grounded.

"Fill me, Radiancy Divine, 

Scatter all my unbelief,

More and more thyself display,

Shining to the perfect day."

The poets become my friends. In Scripture and song, they're present. they enter in and point me back to the Father. 

So I tread on with steadfastness and hope, holding pages to my chest, reaching my hand to touch the glimpse of light shining so uniquely in a universe of darkness.

"Light! more light! the

shadows deepen,

And my life is ebbing low,

Throw the windows widely open: 

Light! more light!"

-Frances Ellen Watkins Harper